First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
