Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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