Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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