'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize