Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
