I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
