Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.