i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
