So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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