Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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