Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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