real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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