sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize