What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
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woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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