just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Randomize
