wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I smell like Dick and happiness
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize