what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
