So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
