So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
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so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
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Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.