You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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