margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
