I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
