weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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