your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i think my mom watched the whole time
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
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