i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
We need to rekindle our bromance
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
