she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
