I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
