from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
