Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
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