Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
