is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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