There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
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He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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