Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
