I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
