Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
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He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
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Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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