idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize
