The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I just had sex on a roof
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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