I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
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