Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
