I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
