It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Randomize
