Texts From Last Night

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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party

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  (225): If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party http://tfl.nu/fuoa
  Replies (28) Good night (4905) Bad night (622)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?

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  (314): On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you? http://tfl.nu/ocb5
  Replies (131) Good night (32178) Bad night (2505)
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  (631): View more from New York

  i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world

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  (631): i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world http://tfl.nu/qaz3
  Replies (30) Good night (6831) Bad night (1203)
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  (555): View more from

  Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.

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  (555): Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me. http://tfl.nu/aho3
  Replies (21) Good night (5823) Bad night (963)
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  (626): View more from California

  We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.

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  (626): We stole a cat. That is all you need to know. http://tfl.nu/xol0
  Replies (14) Good night (3342) Bad night (1330)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one

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  (513): you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one http://tfl.nu/cjl0
  Replies (9) Good night (2280) Bad night (861)
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  (661): View more from California

  The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.

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  (661): The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me. http://tfl.nu/fztu
  Replies (6) Good night (2186) Bad night (727)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.

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  (615): i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at. http://tfl.nu/fdq1
  Replies (2) Good night (1713) Bad night (611)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.

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  (612): i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough. http://tfl.nu/e9ws
  Replies (1) Good night (1122) Bad night (846)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face

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  (773): No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face http://tfl.nu/5tso
  Replies (4) Good night (600) Bad night (1566)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding

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  (613): Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding http://tfl.nu/o6yr
  Replies (6) Good night (702) Bad night (1253)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man

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  (612): buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man http://tfl.nu/4qce
  Replies (4) Good night (406) Bad night (730)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.

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  (561): Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring. http://tfl.nu/lpoq
  Replies (2) Good night (572) Bad night (276)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.

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  (571): If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies. http://tfl.nu/9cow
  Replies (3) Good night (516) Bad night (241)
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  (925): View more from California

  Where did you go?

  (1-925): View more from California

  I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.

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  (925): Where did you go? (1-925): I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever. http://tfl.nu/3xtr
  Replies (0) Good night (614) Bad night (199)

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