I saw his package. It spoke to me.
love makes seman taste better
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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