i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
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