i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize