Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize
