I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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