So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
