drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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