whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
