I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
